Conflict

Heyo.
It's me the hypocrite. Look, I am back!
Yep, you're correct, I feel guilty so I decided to blog again.
I don't think this blog will have a direct message, that would be almost rude of me to try and preach something, I haven't talked to God in a while.
I'm so human sometimes it disgusts me.

You know what... sometimes I will have these break through s where I will really try to be with God, and then I stop!
Perhaps I get retardedly busy with something else or get interest in a girl.. or just do something stupid.

Priority. That is my problem. I am not good with Priorities, and you'd think that sense God loves ME so much, I wouldn't have a problem, after all I am the most selfish thing in the world... well actually that was exaggeration, but you get the point. I am always so focused on me, that now I find myself losing friends, losing my relationship with God which in the end losing things and opportunities for myself.

I wish I could be one of those wise people who write blogs on their websites and know a whole lot, and spend time with God everyday, I mean I used to be that person. Maybe that is what this stage in my life is for.... To screw up and be sad about it, and get priorities wrong all the time..
But doesn't that seem like a waste of time, for some reason I don't think that is what God has in mind for me.


hufff and puff.. sometimes I get frusterated.

Not to mention I totally climbed up the sin ladder way more then I used to...



I want to make a promise to myself. A big one. And I want to try and keep it.
I want to spend time with god everyday this summer, and not do anything until I spend time with him, now I will have to plan in order to do this. But that is okay, I need that. After I spend time with God each day, I will blog. I will try to say something empowering to someone if anyone reads this. Maybe god will get people to read this if I start that.

I know if I spend time with god, my relationships with friends, and everyone God wants me to be with will flourish. I can totally become the guy I want to be.
I need to realize that everyone slips up sometimes, but I don't want to use that. The devil is not going to like the whole me and God hanging out but I have to work through that. I have to stay strong, if your out there, pray for me. That would be cool.

I need to make another promise to myself..
I will not get drunk at grad parties this summer (just throwing that out there)

It starts tomorrow.
WOOOOOOP